Those moments when I just want to walk out

There are certain places where you are pretty much conditioned to behave.

You know what I'm talking about. Sitting in a church pew during a service. Visiting someone in a hospital. Working in an office.

And that's me. Working in an office. Being forced to play nice.

When things go wrong at work, I keep things to myself. When people get calls from unhappy outside callers, I try to be a filter. I console the caller. I take as much information as possible. Then I email my co-worker the message. This way the caller can vent. This way my co-worker doesn't have to speak with an unhappy caller. This way my co-worker can research the situation and have an answer before speaking with the caller. Typically, this works. But not today!

Around 8:45am, I got a call from a Lady who was a little perturbed. She asked we'd received some information she'd sent over on Tuesday. I looked into the account and confirmed that we indeed had received the documents. She then asked if the person who maintains the account, Kim, had received the documentation. I confirmed that the documents had been forwarded to Kim on Tuesday. The Lady said she was a little disappointed because she'd left Kim a couple voicemails to call to discuss the documents. I then let the Lady know that I'd leave Kim a note that she wanted a call back from Kim to discuss the paperwork. Once I got off the phone, I sent Kim an email.

Kim emailed me back within a couple minutes. Who was the caller? How did I get the call? I let her know that who the lady was. I told her that the Lady called me directly. Then I went on with my day.

Lo and behold, around 2:30pm I got a call. It was the Lady again and she wasn't happy because she hadn't gotten a call back yet. Yes. Almost six hours later it hadn't received a call back. So what to do? What to do? I sent an email to Kim's supervisor to let her know that Kim hadn't responded. The supervisor then sent out an email to Kim to make a return call. Kim then emails me and asks if I'd received another call from the Lady. I confirmed that the Lady called 10 minutes prior. Kim then stalked walked over to my desk, which is about 3 rows over from hers.

The Lady called again?
Yes. She said that she wanted to talk about some documents she sent over on Tuesday.


Then she stalked walked off.


And guess what? She ended up emailing me again to say (and I'm paraphrasing) that if someone calls for her to forward the person onto her directly. Okay fine. I will. When someone calls for Kim (especially when they're in a bad mood), I'll just transfer them onto her. I won't buffer her whatsoever anymore. You crap on me like that at work? I am no longer willing to help you in any way. NO. WAY. NO. HOW.

Dang it all. It's when people act like this that make me so mad. When people take their crappy behavior out on me. I try with all my might to maintain myself at work. When I'm in a bad mood, I try to just contain myself. Keep my yuckiness to myself. Keep things under wraps. But that's just the way I am. I don't want to spread my bad vibe to those around me. And when people spread THEIR yuckiness to me? I can get pretty ticked off. And today? I was so ticked off that I felt like crying. I equate how I feel like a volcano. I typically let my anger - my magma - simmer underneath the surface. But once too much pressure -- anger -- builds up, a slight blow escapes. And a blow for me? In the past, I've thrown a highlighter onto one of my cube walls. But today? Those angry hot tears came as I typed away on my computer. Oh how I detest crying!

What a way to end my week...

I'm just so happy it's the weekend. I've got time to spend with my kiddos. Time to be a couch potato and cuddle. But I do plan on taking a run sometime. [sigh] The weekend....I love it.

Long time no see

Life has caught up with me.

The busy-ness of it all.

Running her and there.

More work than time available.

But I must tell you that on Saturday I did something for me.

It was a cloudy morning, so I decided to take a jog.

Remember when I used to run?

Well, I've never gotten back into the groove since moving here.

My darn acid-reflux had gotten so bad that I just couldn't run.

I couldn't. Too much acid.

And since then?

I've just been working. Working hard to bring home the bacon.

So I went out Saturday morning for an easy jog jog-walk.

I had a general idea about the distance. I ended up getting back home in 30 minutes.When I got back, I looked it up on Google Maps and it ended up being 2.6 miles.

Is that good? 2.6 miles in 30 minutes?

I have to tell you that it felt good. That way your lungs feel afterwards. The slight strain of something being worked.

I definitely stretched once I got home. I'm not as limber as I was before. That's something I have to invest some time in. Getting my flexibility back. I used to be pretty flexible and it was just so sad to see how much stiffer my body is.

I wasn't too sore on Sunday, which is a good sign for me. On Monday I felt just fine.

So tonight after I put dinner down for the kids? I ventured back out. A shorter distance this time -- only 1.9 miles. I figured it would be better so that I could get used to it again.

I must tell you though....I pretty much jogged the entire way. Yes. I did stop a couple times when I had to wait for the lights to change so I could cross safely. But I ran jogged the entire way! I am super happy!

Hopefully I'll MAKE time to do this a few days a week. I  know a lot of you are able to go out and do it. But I just find it hard to fit in while I'm doing the single parent thing. How do you single parents do it? Any advice would be great.

Hosting a family event

Oh hey!

I'm hosting my family for Easter lunch tomorrow.

ARGH!!!!!

It's not so bad really. I'm doing my best not to over-analyze things, like I normally do.

I did spent today cleaning from top to bottom. I also did the laundry.

Thankfully, my Mom got the kids around 2:45pm this afternoon to take them to our church's Easter Egg Hunt. It's actually 6:57pm and my Mom just called to let me know that they were coming home.

Yes. They've been gone for over FOUR hours! I was able to finish up the laundry and go to the grocery store for some additional items.

So what am I serving tomorrow? I'm fixing some crock-pot ham, stuffed mushrooms, homemade baked mac-n-cheese, quinoa, and some steamed veggies. My Mom is probably going to bring some stuff even though I didn't ask her to. My sister is bringing some pasta and dessert. She's a baker. I have no idea what she's going to make, but whatever it is it's going to be yummy.

The kids' are so happy that they're going to see their older cousins. They just love hanging out with them. And I enjoy watching them all get along now. Yes. There were some issues between my son and my youngest nephew when they were little. My nephew was jealous or something about my son and wasn't very nice to him. There was some knocking down and unkind words. The two get along famously now that they're 8 and 11 AND about the same height.

Anyway, I'll be awake bright and early tomorrow to get the food cooked. I'm thinking 5am would be the best start time. The ham has got to cook for at least 6 hours, so that'll have it finished by the time we get back from church. I'll prep the mac-n-cheese so that I can just throw it into the oven when we get back. I'll get the mushroom stuffing all prepped as well so that I can get those into the oven when we get back as well. And then I'm going to make the quinoa and the veggies fresh. I think it'll be a nice time for us all.

What I don't enjoy about the whole thing is that I'm the only one getting stuff together. Normally for parties, the Hubs would be helping me clean and doing the food shopping. This time? It's just me. So I'm missing him a lot. A. LOT. But thankfully my family will be around me. Even though my heart is aching, I won't be alone. And that means a great deal to me.

Acting like kids & being silly

While my children can be at each other's throats at times. They can totally play together in the most silly ways.

They have a shorthand communication where they know how to move a "game" along.

I was working on the computer while I was watching a movie while they played. Then when I turned around.  THIS was the first image I saw.

What the HECK is on my girl's head?

It's a pair of "earmuffs" that my son created during art class that my daughter re-purposed into a "facemask". You can see the lightsaber she's flung over her shoulder. What you don't fully see is the messenger bag she's got over her shoulder with all her supplies. That's a plastic snake wrapped around her waist like a belt. Then she's got her foot in a bucket to simulate a pegleg. That's right folks. A pegleg. Like a pirate. Don't you love her serious face below?

While my daughter went all out in her creation, my son went the more traditional route.

While my daughter does a serious face? My son always makes a comical one. Can they be any more opposite?

But the two of them played for about 3 hours before they had to take a break from each other.

It's just funny listening to them "act" out their scenarios. For a while there I had the movie on mute while I just listened to them chitter-chatter with each other.

I love it when they get along. It makes me so thankful that they are my kids. THAT and the relief that I didn't have to referee. Right?

Costs a pretty penny to stay hydrated

I live in an area that has horrible tap water. HORRIBLE.

As a kid, we drank water from the tap. And I hated it. I didn't like the taste at all.

Now as an adult, I realize why growing up I didn't enjoy drinking water.

Because the quality of the water from the tap was horrible.

Like it is now.

When the Hubs and I bought our first house in the desert, we invested in an RO system.

I must tell you that the water tasted wonderful.

But I thought water didn't have a taste, you ask?

You'd taste the difference if you'd been drinking tap water your whole life.

When the kids and I moved here, I didn't want to have to buy bottled water every week - it's so darn HEAVY!

My solution? One of those water filter systems.

Fine and dandy.

But we drink a lot of water when we're home and this little container just couldn't keep up.

So I started to research other water systems.

I mean, the kids and I mainly drink water. We don't do a lot of juice. We don't do soda. Yeah, we're pretty boring.

I realized that one system I'd read about was far better than any other I could find at a regular store (versus getting something online).

And after a week of contemplation? I bought it.

Yes, I did!

Not only does it filter out more contaminants, it's got a much larger reservoir.

In this scenario, bigger is better.

What's even more interesting is that this particular unit came with a water testing mechanism.

I tested water from the tap and it registered 464.

I tested water from my original unit and it registered 333.

I then tested the new unit and it registered 0. ZERO!

Needless to say, I am mighty impressed with the results.

And even though the filters cost 1 1/2 times of the original unit, I think the end result it worth it.

Less junk in my kids' system, you know?

Everything I do is for them...

Long day ahead

It's 5:34am right now.

Many of you wake up around this time every weekday to get ready for work and get your dis ready for school.

The big problem?


I woke up at 4am and could not go back to sleep.

FOUR O'CLOCK!!!

My eyes are going to be tired today.

I can already feel it.

I typically drink decaf but today I'm going to need some caffeine.

Oh yeah!

Big time.

And now?

It's time for me to make some sandwiches for the kids and throw some stuff together for myself as well.

Then it'll soon be time for me to rouse my sleeping children.

The kids were on Spring Break this past week, so I'm sure they'll be kind of horrible this morning. You parents KNOW what I'm about.

But we'll get back into the groove.

No worries.

But I'm definitely going to need some strong coffee today.

A bit of quiet for my restless spirit

No news about my husband and finding a new job.

So my mind?

It's been endlessly shifting between being upset and then being okay.

I try my hardest to be okay and fine when I'm with the kids.

Then I'm alone in bed at night and there are times when I let my mind go into despair mode.

When I do get into that kind of mood, I do allow myself to bit upset for a little while.

But then I try to read some inspirational verses from my Bible and finish with prayer.

I mean, that's all I can really do.

It's up to the Hubs to keep looking and get a job.

I can't do that for him.

My job is to keep the kids occupied and happy AND to keep the home fires burning here.

[sigh]

But I did sign up the Bear for football this Fall.

The Princess is all signed up for middle school.

AND I started working out a little bit this weekend.

Yes, I did!

Some sit-ups and pushups.

The Bear kept me company today when I ventured out on a 3-mile walk that had a nice hill in it.

It felt so good to be outside on such a beautiful day!

I've definitely got to continue to do this for myself, you know?

I may just make an "appointment" for myself to take a walk/job about 2 days a week before I pick up the kids from school, which means not staying late at work.

It'll be a little snippet of quiet in my week that I definitely need. 

What happens when no one says anything?

My son is a person who doesn't complain about much.

He's pretty easy-going about most things.

He just goes with the flow.

Oh! Except when we doing errands. And then it's all about the dragging feet and sighing behind me.
 
Are we done yet?

We were walking to a store and I noticed that he was walking strange.

Me: Why are you walking funny, buddy?
Bear: I am?
Princess: It's because his shoes are broken.
Me: Your shoes are broken?
Bear: Yeah. The bottom is a little broken.

I had him lift his shoe and I immediately chose to head on over to the shoe store that day.

Y'all? His shoes were a mess. It wasn't just he one shoe. BOTH shoes were "broken". Look how abused the shoes are.

The bottoms were just a mess. Can you see the HOLES?

No wonder my son was walking funny. And no wonder that he was trying to avoid puddles (which would make his socks wet).

I felt like such a bad mother. I should have been checking his shoes. But I figured he would tell me if there were any issues.

I should have figured that his participation in running club would put some quick wear-n-tear on his shoes. He runs every Tuesday and Thursday at recess. I mean, he's already accumulated 50 miles for the school year. You'd think the lightbulb would click on in my brain, eh?  Sucky Mom Award! 

Thankfully, we were able to find two pairs of shoes for him at the first store we stopped at. That's an amazing achievement since he's got duck feet like me. Yes. WIDE feet! And the new shoes are one full size larger than what he was wearing. Ay-yay-yay!

Here are both pairs in all their clean glory. Because these things are going to get some immediate abuse.